What to Do? Writes to Dear Amy: I witnessed young men (under legal age) openly smoking marijuana in front of the parents and guests — both young and old. A young girl, not yet a teen, drinking alcohol. When it was brought to the attention of the parents, they did not object!
Dear What to Do: Some parents have different strategies for dealing with their children’s introduction to alcohol and pot than your style of strict prohibition. Many feel that making them forbidden fruit is non-productive, and just makes these substances more attractive to the children, who will then imbibe them in a spirit of rebellion.
There are more marajuana dispensaries in legalizing states than there are Starbucks or McDonald’s. Obviously, many children are seeing their parents routinely toking at home.
Ultimately, we are bringing up our children to be adults and to handle all of life’s temptations without us around – and there’s more than just pot and alcohol on that menu. It’s best that they try some things with us around, and learn the effect on their bodies – and that it’s not all fun, rather than to be forbidden them until they have them with peers in an adventure outside of our supervision.
Heavy, excessive use of marijuana or alcohol is known to disrupt the development of young brains. However, this is not the use you witnessed.
You told a parent. They didn’t freak out. Don’t bring it up again.
If you seriously want to be helpful: stay sober and be a designated driver, or put some of the more drunk or stoned adults and their families in a Lyft or Uber – and sponsor another so that they can get their vehicles later.